Monday, December 19, 2011

Caught up in disappointment

Anyone else have that problem... where, you can't see the 1 million awesome things happening - but, you notice and focus on the little petty things? Yea, me neither. :/


Actually - I'm the biggest offender in this category sometimes. And it's something I'm working through in my personal life and walk with the Lord. To be honest with myself and you, right now I'm battling big time. I KNOW truth. I KNOW reality. But, for some reason my heart and head are having a hard time connecting. I'm caught up in disappointment. I forget that people fail. Big fails. Little fails. I fail. Maybe it's not even forgetting...but, choosing to not remember.



This weekend my husband and some of our teens {and leaders} took a trip down to one of our local homeless shelters/missions. As I've shared before my husband is passionate about serving in this way - I'm thankful for that, and him. This weekend they took down new bedding and an offering the teens raised to support the needy during Christmas. Did I mention this was all student initiated and run? God has been at work in the lives of some of our teens... it's very exciting. They took time to make several beds with the new sheets and pillows they bought. After they'd make a bed, they would kneel down and pray over it - and the person who would be sleeping there that night. Powerful. Then they sat through one of the missions "sessions" with the people who live there - and had some interaction that way.


It's the times like that where I'm left convicted and dumbfounded, really. So.much.good. God is working in hearts, changing lives, impacting a new generation.... and here I sit bent out of shape because it's not EVERY student. How selfish. How arrogant to think what I say and how I say it will change a life. How ungrateful to not give thanks for these few. These precious. Those growing and trying. And I wonder, "Why on earth am I so intent on being stuck in disappointment?". I keep thinking of how the prophets in the OT must have felt. Isaiah, Jeremiah - no one listened. No one cared. No one loved God. And they were preaching death sentences, even.


Psalm 14:3


"Everyone has turned away. Together they have become rotten to the core. No one, not even one person, does good things."




All this to say, the Lord is working on me. And I'm thankful. I'm thankful for watching teenagers grow and change and embrace the narrow road. I'm thankful for leaders who give up their lives, their saturdays, their everything... to touch one stubborn {at times} life. I'm thankful for tender hearts, for apologies, and honest tears. And I'm thankful to GOD for reminding me time and time and time again...


YOU WERE ONCE...

I DIDN'T GIVE UP ON YOU...

I HAVE LOVED YOU WITH AN EVERLASTING LOVE.

YOU ARE FREE FROM DISAPPOINTMENT. TRUST IN ME. LET ME HOLY SPIRIT DO THE WORK.




And that is my freedom today. I will glory in my redeemer. The redeemer of souls, the heart healer, the almighty God who sees every heart and tear and pain and frustration. I will choose joy. I will choose rejoicing. And I'll be thankful even if just one... loves God.



*for the record, Praise God, we see lots of Love for our Savior around here!

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