Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Truth is...

I see this phrase "Truth is..." all.the.time on Facebook. Teens put it up and then want people to write something they think is true about them - on their wall. In return that person will write something back that is true about them. For example, "Truth is... you are so pretty and easy to talk to, I love having 4th hour with you." I'm sure you've all at least seen this pop up on your newsfeeds.

It strikes me EVERY TIME I see it. Because really, in the world we live in today - Truth isn't truth at all. Truth is whatever opinion you want to believe or whatever emotion you are high on. I'm guilty of it. And I see generations guilty of it.

Just last night I had an encounter with an ugly side of myself. This...non-truth thinking self. I keep it hid well, usually, but, sometimes it sneaks out before I can put the lid on it. It was a normal Tuesday all day long. We ended the evening by taking a family trip to Target to go grocery shopping. That's normally something I do alone - for many good and holy reasons. However, we are still down two cars {basically} - so we loaded up the 15 passenger church van and away we went. We are a sight. It was fine and even enjoyable. Daddy had one little girl in his cart and I the other. We divided and conquered...something my control freak self could normally NEVER do. But, as I watched two of my beloveds walking away with their list of items to grab the thought occured to me..."man, I'm going to miss this someday." It was all I could do not to break down right there in the canned fruit aisle and bawl like a baby. My heart was heavy over the thought that someday my babes will grow and leave me and my young, handsome, husband will be old. {Lord willing} Even I would need the help of someone - and won't have my health and youth. And that's life. I smiled down at my two-tooth wonder of an almost 9 month old and just sighed at her. And, a tear escaped. Can't I just freeze these days?! Can't I just bottle up the energy and pure love of my 3 year old? The chubby legs of a newly crawling baby?! Ah, the torment we moms endure sometimes of that weird split mind feeling..."could this day go any slower/ I can't believe how fast these kids are growing up!?" Relate?

Anyway. Truth.
I went to bed lastnight and I did what I almost always do. I flip open my phone and look at any pics I took of my children that day. I looked and looked and looked... until I realized I had scrolled all the way back to when August was born. Out of nowhere I was in a battle and losing quickly. The scab was pulled back and the pain had resurfaced.

Because as much as I try not to compare... I still battle. I battle when I see other moms able to nurse and enjoy their babies, when I couldn't. When I meet a 6 week old my mind automatically goes back to what happened when my little one turned 6 weeks old, while I was in the hospital, separated from her. :/

And though I know TRUTH. Though I try to stay focused on TRUTH. My flesh tries so hard to believe that my emotions are what is true... and it really IS a battle. My friends, how we feel IS NOT TRUTH.

I'm reading a book right now and wouldnt you know that today's chapter was about just such things. {funny how that happens} Most specifically it was about "Thinking the truth about God and His Word". I was so comforted and encouraged - that I just needed to share some reminders for anyone else who finds themselves caught up in emotion, lies, or just past pains coming back to haunt.

"Another crucial step toward loving God with all our mind is determining to place the Bible's truths above everything we think or feel."

What is truth?

- Psalm 139:14, I am fearfully and wonderfully made, no matter what I or others think about me.

- 2 Timothy 1:9, He has a GRAND plan and purpose for my life

- 1 Corinthians 12:7-11, He has given me spiritual gifts that I can use to benefit others, no matter how I may be floundering or failing at the moment.

- Romans 8:35, I am ALWAYS loved and accepted by God

{excerpt from Loving God with all your mind}

I'm better today. I'm back to accepting God's will in my life and being thankful for two healthy children, a healthy mommy, and a happy, loving daddy. And when I'm presented with a "truth is" scenario again - I feel a little more prepared.

"God uses His truth to break the cycle of destructive thinking that leads to discouragement, despair, doubt, and depression."

Truth is...Are YOU thinking on truth today?

1 comment:

Jill said...

Hi Mandi, so excited to find your blog! You are a great writer. This was a great reminder today. Thanks for the encouragement. <3