Thursday, June 6, 2013

Just rest, sister

"When you just can't see how you can go on, or you notice that you have become obsessed or overwhelmed by your circumstances, cling to Jesus."  -Gloria Furman

It's like these very words were written down just for me today. As I continue to battle my flesh and mind - a very real war might I add - over the temptation to worry and fret. What you don't know is that we went to look at a house yesterday. A lovely, spacious, more then we even thought possible, house. Of course I loved the fenced in back yard completed by a swing set, landscaped everything, and amazing deck. Not to mention the finished space in the basement, extra living room {with fireplace!}, and that it's a whopping 2 mins from my husbands work. {grin} It's in exactly the right location and meets every single one of the things on our wish list - well, minus the fact it only has 1 tub.

The problem is always paying for things. Ha! Can I get an amen on that? I guess somedays I just feel so blindsided by reality - who knew things were so expensive?! So, while I believe with my whole entire heart that the Lord has His hand not only in the situation but OVER it... this little feeble and frail heart just wants to sit on the ground and cry like a baby with worry. And the thing's JUST money. I found myself obsessing over details and dollar signs and making everything line up just exactly so - in the meantime trying to keep my mind in tune to the fact that Christ rules and reigns and there is NO pressure when I rest in that. Lastnight as we climbed into bed after another long day of ministry and life - my eyes would not close, literally. While my body was exhaused, I couldn't shut down the ol' brain. My husband took my hand and we prayed short and simple prayers - for direction, for peace, for timing. And best of all... that if this was NOT what He had for us, that it would be made known. 3 hours later, after tossing and turning and plotting in the dark - I fell asleep.

It's a new day and the temptation to freak out is present. Even now I'm on the verge of being on the edge. So I cling to Jesus and the promise that He's in control and He knows my lack of understanding in all things - including having faith. I'm fighting hard and reminding myself to do what I need to and then, rest. Whatever your circumstances are today - I pray that you can rest, too. And cling to Jesus who knows our hearts.

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